The “Shower Spaz”…

The “Shower Spaz”…

Once again, today’s blog is on a personal note. As I have made mention, there are MANY, MANY, Spider Spazing Techniques. Most have been tried and tested, and passed down from generation to generation. However, some are born out of a particular, unforseen circumstance. When this happens…. you swing from the hip. This is where the creation of the “Shower Spaz” came to light. I was taking a shower and had just applied shampoo to my hair. I got a good lather going and was concerned as some seemed to be getting into my eyes. It was really starting to sting, when with one eye only partially open I saw IT. The Lord’s prayer began coming to mind as I quickly tried to get the shampoo out of my eyes, while NEVER taking my ONE eye off of IT’S eight eyes! As I leaned into the stream of water, IT MOVED! TOWARDS ME! Thus, the birth of the Shower Spaz. I set to screaming and began this pathetic “Flash Dance” tip toed jogging in place motion. Soap was flying, water was spraying, eyes were stinging, when I grab my shower poof and hurl it at the unwelcome intruder, when as fate would have it, IT DISAPPEARS! I believe this is the moment when an Aracnaphob comes to know what true fear is. With soap stinging my eyes, I scan the Shower like some quivering Cyclops..and THERE IT WAS! In the corner of the bathtub, watching all eight of ME! For a brief moment I thought to myself, ” maybe I could just live with it for three days while I apply for a hand gun permit”. Then with a surge of adrenaline like I have never known, poof in hand I lunged and MASHED!! That’s right, ME, the naked, flash dancing, screaming, Cyclops killed a Spider all by MYSELF!! It was on that day I found out what I was made of. I stood a little taller, walked a little prouder..and it was comforting to know there would be days that I could at last, leave the can of RAID at home.

6 Comments

  1. Omg . U always make my day . U know they are more afraid of u then u are of them . Just like on a trail ride if u come across a cougar or bob cat or any cat of that nature u just sit up big and tall ans make ur self as big as possible . U could prob do the same with the spider . Love reading about ur adventures.

    • You are too sweet! I could weigh 450 pounds and I will NEVER be big enough to take on a spider!! LOL!

  2. Love the “Flash Dance” reference! I can totally visualize it lol.

  3. I would of been trying to climb my way out for sure!!

    • I couldn’t. “IT” was blocking my way. LOL!

  4. LOL…I’m curious if you sterilized your hand or foot that you used to kill that spider. I would’ve sent it on it’s way down the drain. Then with it’s 8 eyes it might find Nemo.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

spiders